Sunday, 18 September 2016

Perfect mummy

How do you parent?
Do you feel the need to be better than your friends or child's classmate's mums?
I remember feeling really intimidated by the apparent perfect mummy's around when i had my first, i seriously doubted i would ever be that good, they seemed to easily be able to juggle work, arrange amazing activities, take their child to every club going whilst cooking up fab homemade meals...hmm so is that really how they are or just amazing at creating that appearance!!!
Once i had my second my thoughts changed, my need to just survive parenthood overrode any other feelings, i developed a strong belief my child will develop when they are ready and that pushing them at age 2 to be 'the best' really wasn't my thing.
I am honestly now at peace with how i parent, and i see the flaws in the perfect parent, somehow, somewhere, something has to give and there has to be a compromise so in the long run the kids all end up at the same place but mine will not have the issue of feeling they have to be best, and struggle with failure when they are not.
We have been lucky to have the opportunity to expose our children to life experiences and discuss the hows and whys of everyday life...a child who can show compassion, understanding and feel comfortable in themselves is in my opinion much richer in wisdom than a child that is made to write their name, learn the 10 times table and read a book by age 4!! Life skills will set them up for life and aid them to develop healthy relationships with their peers and those entrusted to teach them.
I am currently teaching my youngest the art of patience, whilst sat waiting on the doctors round in hospital, where we have been for 24 hours now!!!!!
Whilst Sitting i can't help but people watch, wherever i go there is always one child who is allowed to show disrespect and it actually amazes me to hear how they speak to their parent and clearly be given freedom to do so when the parents back down and allow themselves to be spoken to in such a disrespectful manner, allowing the child to have 'power' over them. It is not my belief that children should be made to feel beneath an adult but be taught to show respect for others and treat others how they would wish to be treated, equal to each other.
I could be proved wrong in this as my kids turn into the kids from hell .... But hopefully with the skills they are given will grow up to be respectful, understanding and compassionate to others.
In my eyes that makes me the better parent!!! 😆

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